The Engagement
It is traditional for the man to ask his future father-in-law's permission for his daughter's hand in marriage, however, it is more common today that the couple get engaged and announce to the parents afterwards. If permission is sought, merely a formality.
It is still customary for the groom to pay for the ring, but it is rare for the groom to choose the ring prior to proposing.
You’re more likely to choose the ring together, but make sure you establish a budget before you go shopping – that way you won’t be disappointed!
Try the engagement ring on with a wedding band - it will look different alongside another ring, rather than on a plain finger.
Meet the Parents
The bride's mother traditionally writes to the groom's parents, expressing delight at the forthcoming marriage and suggests that a date and venue be found for both sides to get together and discuss the planning.
It’s more likely these days, however, that the parents will already have met, but use the excuse to meet up to celebrate over dinner with the bride and groom to discuss the wedding plans together.
The Party
An engagement party is by no means essential, but it is a great excuse for a celebratory gathering. Ideally, the party should be held within a month or two of announcing the engagement.
Traditionally one set of parents would organise and throw a party, although it is more likely you’ll arrange and host the party yourselves with family and friends.
The engagement party may be the first time many guests meet either the bride or groom and their respective friends and family.
If the parents of the bride are hosting the party, it is customary for the father of the bride to give a small speech and toast the couple.
Remember that guests invited to an engagement party will expect to be invited to the wedding too, so don't get too carried away with numbers!
The Gift List
The tradition of giving wedding gifts to the newlyweds originates from a time when the couple would have spent their lives, prior to marriage, in their parental homes. Marriage was - and often still is - a time of setting up the new marital home from scratch.
Today, however, you are both more likely to have lived independently or together, prior to the marriage and the gift list was introduced to prevent duplication of the same gift.
Compile your list of required items and make it available to anyone who intends to give a gift.
To make it even easier, you could place this with a well-known retailer who controls and sends out the gifts for you.
The Venue
Traditionally, the marriage would take place in a church or other religious venue and a separate venue would be booked for the wedding breakfast and ongoing celebrations throughout the day.
It is more common these days to have the ceremony in the same place as the reception with more venues being granted a special licence including hotels, castles and stately homes.
There’s lots of things to consider when choosing your venue, but the most important consideration is to book early!
Popular venues are booked up well in advance, so you need to make this one of your first priorities.
The Honeymoon
Traditionally, the groom would choose the destination of the honeymoon and keep it a secret until the day.
It’s more likely that you will organise your honeymoon together – probably somewhere neither of you have been before.
These are the main traditions to planning your wedding but there’s much more to think about – Part 3 outlines the various elements of the timelines and provide a useful planning checklist.
